Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Letter to Hank #10 - It's Like Hebrews!

Wow this really does get easier! Well, no not easier but different every day! Your so big now we brush your teeth, clean big ole’ poops, consider cutting your hair, and don’t worry so much when you’re sick. It’s not that we don’t worry but you can handle so much more and it’s great! It’s actually a relief!

You are 15 months old. You look a lot like your Mommy (that means you’re really cute :D) now. And you won’t eat anything other than bread, yogurt, cheese and baby food fruit! I got lazy one night and gave you a tiny piece of Papa John’s pizza - I paid for that twice when it left you with the nighttime pukes. When you don’t like something you scrunch your nose up and pooch your lips. Or you just look at me like I’ve put nuclear waste on your tray and hand it back to me. " No, this won't do"

Fear. You don’t have much but I found out that you don’t like parrots. We were at the beach and a parrot was in a large cage in the resort lobby; it squaked at you and that was the end of that. Every time we passed the cage, even sans bird, you shook your head no. You loved the pool and had a great time with the other kids although you didn’t know that going under meant not breathing. You’d jump out of my arms to imitate the bigger kids but what was funny was when you emerged looking like “ What the hell was that?!”

And you are walking. The kind of walking where you don’t have knees. And the kind of walking that produces bloody noses; seeing you smash your poor nose on the floor broke my heart! But, as you usually do, recovery was swift. My recovery, on the other hand, was not swift and I still get an adrenaline rush when you trip.

Oh and independent, holy cow! The frustration level exceeds industry standards when toys don’t work just how you want them to!

You have no idea you are doing this but as you are growing you are helping your Mom and Dad. As if the beginning wasn’t good enough, it gets better. It’s like the book of Hebrews! You are making us not depend on permanence. Pushing us so far out of our comfort zone that there is no choice but to look for the positive! I thought I knew what change was and I thought I knew how to deal with it but you have shown me what it means to stick with something through anything. No running away. Unconditional. And with a smile on my face.

I do not want to disappoint you by letting you know that not everyday is full of super accomplishments and excitement. Honestly, I do not want to disappoint you at all. But how do I discipline without negativity? It’s my duty to give boundaries and sometimes firm ones, as you have already found out. I actually enjoy the small tantrums that have been occuring lately, since they are new and novel I can laugh now. I won't later. Obviously, I already worry about your spirit and keeping it intact. I don’t think I can tell you how many times I’ve had to tell myself that the Lord gives you only what you can handle…ummm, ok, I guess he knows what he’s doing. And too, Hank, be comforted that he only gives YOU what you can handle.

I wish the only thing I had to worry about now is shielding you from your Daddy’s love of Meatloaf. Not the dinner but the singer. Ugh.

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